


Why Don't We Live a Little?

by Stargazer2369



Series: The Myths Can't Always Control Us [1]
Category: Slavic Mythology & Folklore
Genre: Boredom, But they can't stop, Enemies to Friends, Fights, Holy cattle, Pagan Gods, Slavic mythology, Snakes, Stealing, They're getting seriously tired of this, Thunder and Lightning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-21
Updated: 2020-12-21
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:27:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 493
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28220895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stargazer2369/pseuds/Stargazer2369
Summary: Every year in Slavic Mythology, Veles (god of the underworld) steals Perun's (god of thunder and lightning) holy cattle. So Perun has to fight him to get it back. And they're getting very fed up.
Relationships: Veles & Perun (Slavic Mythology & Folklore)
Series: The Myths Can't Always Control Us [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2067351





	Why Don't We Live a Little?

**Author's Note:**

> Slavic Mythology tells of a persisting conflict involving Perun, god of thunder and lightning, and Veles, the 'black god' and 'horned god' of the underworld. Enmity between the two is initiated by Veles' annual ascent up the world tree in the form of a huge serpent and his ultimate theft of Perun's divine cattle from the heavenly domain; Perun retaliates to this challenge of the divine order by pursuing Veles, attacking him with lightning bolts from the sky. Veles taunts Perun and flees, transforming himself into various animals and hiding behind trees, houses, even people, and lightning bolts striking down trees and homes were explained as a result of this. In the end, Perun overcomes Veles and defeats him, then returning him to his place in the realm of the dead; thus the order of the world is maintained.

Perun, Slavic god of thunder and lightning, peered out of his window boredly. He knew exactly what was going to happen in around... oh... five minutes - how could he not? It had happened every year for millennia. And, to be frank, it was getting dull. Just because the humans thought it would be a good idea to write down stories of his chasing the theif through the air, he was forced to do just that for countless millennia!

There was a loud moo, and Perun sighed, clambering to his feet. That was the all-too familiar sound of his cattle being stolen, oh, and there went Veles (horned god of the underworld) in serpent form (ridiculous), back down the world tree. Perun groaned, cast one last longing look back at his cosy home, and dashed off in pursuit, lightning bolt in hand.

"Hi," said Veles, hovering in front of him. Perun half-heartedly throws a lightning bolt at him. Veles half-heartedly dodges. "So... I've got your cattle."

"I know. We do this every year."

Veles laughed, even though it hadn't been very funny. A long, long time ago, they'd been mortal enemies, what with Perun's outrage at Veles' thievery and Veles' grumpiness, but they'd bonded over their annoyance at this chore. That didn't mean that Perun had forgiven him for stealing his son away, but Jarilo was reborn every New Year anyway, and fighting over him was a method of taking out their annoyance on each other. Veles always won, though.

"Are you going to chase me, or..."

Perun wavered. On the one hand, it wouldn't do for him to do anything other than chasing the other god, but on the other hand...

"I'm bored. This is stupid. Let's do something else."

Veles' eyes widened.

"WHAT? But- but- but we've been doing this since the dawn of time!"

"I know. That's the problem."

Veles stared at him like what he'd just suggested was impossible. Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't, but Perun couldn't think of anything better to do than figure it out.

"Why did you even want the cows in the first place, Veles?"

"It was never about the cows, Perun. Life was boring. Life is too boring. There's just too much of it, and too little of it. I wanted to live a little. Do you ever feel like you aren't living?"

"Too much. We've let the stories control us far too much, haven't we."

"Oh yes."

"Wanna live a little?"

"Oh yes."

"Are you going to say anything other than 'Oh yes'?"

"Oh yes."

They both laughed, and linked arms. 

"You know," said Veles suddenly, "I've heard that Dažbog is around... and he's always fun to make trouble with...."

"To Dažbog we go, then, friend," said Perun, and they walked together into the sunrise, two immortal beings carving their own paths amongst the heavens.

"But Veles."

"Yes, Perun?"

"If we're fighting the myths, let me keep Jarilo this New Year."

"No promises!"

**Author's Note:**

> So, they were talking about Jarilo:   
> On the great night (New Year), two children of Perun are born: Jarilo, god of fertility and vegetation and son of the Moon, and Morana, goddess of nature and death and daughter of the Sun. On the same night, the infant Jarilo is snatched and taken to the underworld, where Veles raises him as his own. At the time of the spring equinox, Jarilo returns across the sea from the world of the dead, bringing with him fertility and spring from the evergreen underworld into the realm of the living. He meets his sister Morana and courts her. With the beginning of summer, the two are married bringing fertility and abundance to Earth, ensuring a bountiful harvest. The union of Perun's kin and Veles' stepson brings peace between two great gods, staving off storms which could damage the harvest. After the harvest, however, Jarilo is unfaithful to his wife and she vengefully slays him, returning him to the underworld and renewing enmity between Perun and Veles. Without her husband, god of fertility and vegetation, Morana – and all of nature with her – withers and freezes in the ensuing winter. She grows into the old and dangerous goddess of darkness and frost, eventually dying by the year's end only to be reborn again with her brother in the new year.


End file.
